All posts in toolongfortwitter

I bought a Mexican Coke at a gas station yesterday, and as I was driving away I remembered that they don’t have twist-offs caps.

As I looked around my car’s interior for something to pry it open with, I thought with all seriousness “Why isn’t there a bottle opener hidden somewhere in the lower part of a car’s dashboard?!” before realizing that’s actually a terrible idea in other contexts.